Lawyer Excuses

25 Things an Incompetent Divorce Lawyer Will Tell You:

By Michael Kelly, Esq.

1. I didn't think you needed child and spousal support that soon.

2. I forgot to file for your spouse to pay your attorney fees, sorry.

3. That's the way that I have always done it.

4. I thought you said you didn't care who got the house?

5. Did you really need your car?

6. I thought you checked your spouses' Income and Expense form?

7. It should only take a couple of years to repair your credit.

8. How much money did your spouse take from the checking account?

9. Don't worry you can use your frequent flyer miles to visit your child.

10. I didn't know that you were in a hurry for that letter.

11. That's not part of the divorce that I'm working on.

12. My superior did not tell me to go ahead with that part of the litigation.

13. You never gave me those parts of the document, ever.

14. How did I know your divorce was different from the other ones.

15. That is the other lawyer's job, not mine.

16. Wait until the head lawyer comes back from court and ask him.

17. We don't make many mistakes at this firm.

18. I didn't think that fact was very important, did you?

19. I'm so overloaded I just can't get around to it now.

20. I thought I told you that last month.

21. I wasn't hired to do that at all.

22. Are you sure you called me?

23. I thought I sent you a copy?

24. Didn't I tell you we had court today?

25. I thought we spoke for 3 hours? That's what my billing statement says .

By Michael Kelly, Esq.